Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Negative Effects

Sadly, this is almost exactly what I look like in my underwear.
Although, much cuter panties and bras.  Seriously.

I'm 26 years old and I experience quite a few of these things.
  • Depression: I've battled it my whole life.  My mom is heavy and on depression meds too.
  • Social Discrimination: Do I even need to go into this?  
  • Low Self-Esteem: Duh, being the fat girl your entire life will do this to you.
  • Joint Problems: My momma had to have her hip replaced at 40.  I already have knee and feet issues that could get worse if I let this continue.

I don't want to look like this anymore.
I don't want to feel like this anymore.

So why do I keep myself in this same self-hating cycle?
Why do I still eat all of these terrible things and make excuses for exercising?

Why do I hate myself this much?
I mean I don't really, but that has to be the explanation.
Because if I really loved myself-I'd go the fucking gym.
I'd put that bag of chips down and get off my ass.

1 comment:

Ellen M. Gregg said...

This is such a hard thing, Miss Angie.

I believe 50% is making a commitment to love yourself, and 50% is taking the steps to get healthy (an act of love). Add them together, and that's 100% love - all for you, and all about you.

You have to decide that you are your #1 priority, and take it from there, knowing you may need to remind yourself of that fact for the rest of your life.


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